i was tagged on myspace to share ten tidbits that the average onlooker might not know about the Urban Diva…i don’t think INFINITEWORDS realized the challenege he put forth by giving me such a mission…the Diva is many things to many people so some of these may come as a surprise while others may come as very much expected…

10. I AM AN ONLY CHILD & I AM THE OLDEST CHILD
Most people are scratching their heads right now trying to figure out that statement. I was blessed to live the best of both worlds. I am my mother’s only child and i lived as an only child until i was 15 years old. I was given every toy i could ever want and loved unconditionally by both my parents (still am for the most part). My dad had my lil brother when i was 15 and now I am the oldest in a family of 6. my stepbrother & stepsisters & my baby cobro & my brother are as truly my family as if we all would have been birthed from the same mama. I love and cherish them with my entire being.

9. MY BLACKBERRY SHOULD BE SURGICALLY CONNECTED TO ME
Since joining the BBville with my Divaberry i have become addicted. Never is that device more than 2 feet from me (except at the occassional staff mtg). The first thing i do in the morning (after turning off the alarm, which happens to be on my BB) is check my BB messenger and emails. The last thing i do at night is make sure the BB has enough battery power to make it through the night.

8. I LOVE TO READ
I may love to read more than i love to shop! And anyone who knows me knows how much i love to shop. I think my passion for reading stems from being an only child. I used to find friends and adventures in books when i was little and be sad to say goodbye when the story ended. Even now sometimes its hard for me to read the last few pages of a book because i know that i will be leaving new friends behind in the pages.

7. I’M SENSITIVE & STUFF!
I was born under the purrfect sign for who i am. Or am i who i am because of the sign i was born under??? that’s one of those questions that will remain unanswered but either way i am the quintessential cancer. i am nurturing and all about giving my friends and family my soul to soothe their own. i adore being surrounded by the positive energy of those i allow in my inner circle. Don’t get it twisted though…i’m a true crab in the sense that my shell is hard to crack. I am unable to let just anyone see the softness that lies beyond the tough exterior. I can build walls better than any carpenter out there when i feel someone needs to be kept out. My caution signs should serve as a warning because if you cross me there is HELL to pay. Once you get beyond my shell though i wear my heart on my sleeve so please handle me with care

6. I LOVE MY SIZE
I am a purrfect, petite package and i love it. It took me a long time to come to terms with being thin & small. People think its only the overweight in the world that have a hard time dealing with weight. i beg to differ. being thin my whole life i used to get questioned all the time on if i had an eating disorder or told how skinny i am. today i look at my body and see the purrfect me. I’m the me that my God intended so i am content. While we all can always see things we would like to improve on ourselves i am in love with the me that i am…

5. I AM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC
It doesn’t matter how many times i see love gone awry in my world or the world of others i still believe that LOVE can OUTLAST ANYTHING. I don’t necessarily believe in happily ever afters but i do believe in love that lasts lifetimes. When i jump the broom i want it to be everlasting. I want to spend 60, 70 or 90 years married to the man i commit to before family, friends and God. I want to know that this is the person that i will wake up next to everyday for all my days. I don’t expect it to all be peaches and cream but i believe that when that time comes me & him will be able to walk through any fire together and come out unburned.

4. IF I WAS ANY ANIMAL…I WOULD BE A PHOENIX
So what that they’re mythical creatures…have you met me? I always rise from whatever tragedy or crisis is put before me. I shall always rise because i’m a firm believer that nothing is ever put before me that i can’t handle.

3. I THINK IN A PAST LIFE I WAS AN EGYPTIAN…LIVING AMONG PHAROAHS AND PRIESTESSES
I’ve always felt this crazy connection to ancient Egypt. Even now when i go to museums i’m drawn to all the Egyptian exhibits and can feel the energy permeate from the artifacts.

2. I CAN’T SLEEP WITH SOCKS ON!
Even when its really cold outside i must sleep barefooted. I cannot remember the last time i was comfortably able to fall asleep with a pair of socks on my feet.

1. I WON THIRD PLACE IN MY SENIOR DAY COSTUME CONTEST
I was a queen bee. I wore my black dance leotard with a bumble bee striped bib thing across the front, antennae, a crown and a sceptor. I came out to a mix i did on a CASSETTE tape of lil kim songs and got the crowd hyped. Personally i think i was cheated out of a higher place but its all good…

and there are 10 things you might not have known about the diva…now consider yourself TAGGED

til next time…besos babe…

Have you ever loved someone so much that your heart felt full? Ever felt tears in your eyes when you were thinking about them and it wasn’t because you were sad but because your heart was so full from love that it was overflowing? If you haven’t then I am sorry for you because nothing feels as good or as scary as that first tear falling.

In doing research for my highly anticipated book New York Men in Mind, one of the questions I ask all my interview subjects is “What is LOVE? & is there a difference between loving someone and being IN LOVE with the person?” I’m not sure I ever stopped to think about my own answer to the first question and I guess after hearing everyone else’s my response is a bit convoluted.

Love is life. It is in every breath we take and should be in every word we speak. Love is everywhere, just some of us don’t know how to open our eyes to see it, our ears to hear it or our mouths to taste it.

Being in Love makes it easy to put your heart in someone else’s care and not worry about it because if love is real that person would walk through fire and back to keep your heart safe. There’s a Jennifer Lopez song, (yes, the Diva is a closet J.LO fan!  what can I say we share the Rican from the BX thing!), Ryde or Die, where she begins to capture being in love. She talks about not knowing how it happened but being in this place where she would give up her last breath to save the person. Now some people might think that’s extreme but I ask you to sit for a moment and think about that one person you are in love with, have been in love with or hope to one day find. Was there not anything you would do to see that person happy?

For those of you who have lost a love she has a line in the song for you too. She says that she would go through the pain again just to find her match and would even surrender her love because that’s how much she does love.

The Diva has been fortunate to always end up with Real Love. I had a man that loved me enough to let me go when I wasn’t happy and I had a man that was willing to give up his last breath just to keep promises made to me.

I’m still working on my definition of love and everyday I get closer. I now realize that while you can love someone without being in love with them you can’t be in love with someone without loving them. And for the Diva who lives a life filled with love she is privileged and blessed to know what it’s like to have a heart so full of loving and blessings that i can go to bed crying happy tears, thank you my love!

Til next time…besos baby!